Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Me and morphine on 17/2/2014 - 18/2/2014. Trying to be a drug addict.

Notes :-  This blog was initially meant to share my birding field trips reports. Ever since I started to use Facebbook I  have not post any updates since then.  This series of posting on Scoliosis is my personal experience.  I had Posterior Spinal Fusion for Scoliosis on 17/2/2014. 

I hope my sharing will serve as an encouragement to those who have spinal deformities like me.  For those who  have Scoliosis, spinal disc herniation, spinal disc degeneration, spondylosis, kyphoysis, do not be afraid/avoid when the  spine doctor recommend  the solution is surgery.  There is hope for you in today modern medical technology.  Please do not endure the pain in silence.

Me and morphine

I do not know how many hours I have gone into such a deep sleep.  Before I slip into deep sleep after the general unaesthetic I remember I told myself to keep dreaming of standing on a field holding my canon D7 + 400mm lens focusing on vulture on migration.  Unfortunately I did not dream of anything at all.  Now I heard my surgeon voice. ”I am Professor Kwan, Wong Chor Mun open your eyes.  I slowly open my eyes but everything is very burly(I need to wear my spectacles).  I don’t feel freezing cold.  I am lying comfortably under a white hospital blanket in my hospital gown, both of hands are by my side.   I heard him loud and clear “Your surgery was successful now please move your ankle”.  I obeyed and I said I am very dizzy now... Is the surgery finish as per schedule?  He replied it is ok just close your eyes and continue your sleep. I see you later.  I could not even have the strength to turn to look whether is he still in surgical gown and did my blood smear his gown.  My brain question am I really married to the titanium now?  How come I am not in pain?

Then hospital assistant send me back to my room in my hospital bed.  I remember passing the corner, the alley, the lift journey and then I am back into my room even through out the journey I close my eyes.  In minutes a few equipment was being pushed in to turn the room to HDU (high dependency unit) .  I have oxygen tube attached to my nose, my right arm are attached to the equipment to measure my blood pressure with the timing set hourly. I have urine catheter , attached to saline water drip and another tube to drain out the excess blood from my incision.  I also attached to morphine dosage dispatcher machine that will release morphine with just a press and an emergency bell to call nurse help.  The nurse informed me that I need to press a button for morphine to relieve my pain if I cannot withstand it and another button for their assistant as there is no family member was with me throughout the night.

The nurses came in every hour and keep remind me to press for morphine dosage. They check my blood pressure, change my drip, monitor my urine bag. I told them it is not that painful. My gum infection last year is worst than this I think I can stand.  Every hour nurses make sure I sleep on my right side this hour and then on my left side the next hour for at least 15 minutes rather than lying flat on my back all the time.  This is to prevent bedsore. Every 2- 3 hrs when I am awake I need to move my ankle 10 times, then my right leg … my left leg and then raise my right hand and then left hand to prevent blood clot. See my nerve are OK  even though the surgery I went through  will send shivers to anyone spine when I tell them it is Spinal Fusion for scoliosis. The surgeons will cut a fine line on my back and then open up my muscles, drill in some screws,connect two rod each on one side use some instrument to turn and rotate my spine for correction while my nerve are closely monitor by another Doctor.

Every hour I keep asking the nurse what is the time and how many hours ago I was out from the surgery.  I refused any sip of water until the 6th hour cause I am afraid throw out.  Aaarrrrhg it is painful… I still think that I can stand but I would be silly if I did not try morphine.  Would morphine make me high?  What is the effect?  Would I scream, yell or start to talk nonstop of sob story?  Is morphine that effective kind of pain killer?  How many press to have the feel of being a drug addict? Let me press one time…shit…pain is still there. I still feel painful.  YOU are a LIAR it does not work for me.   Another press again would I get rashes? …..too many press how to drain out all the drugs from my body later?  I don’t want to vomit .  I then concentrate to divert the concentration of my pain to sleeping. Sleeping is best to forget about pain.  Hour and hour has pass and I only did 3 press of morphine.  In actual fact I only dd 2 press on the PCA (patient control analgesia).  

Sorry  no one was there to snap any photos on how I look on hospital bed when all the tubes are attached on me.

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